Since the inception of Facebook,it has drastically changed the the way in which we communicate with each other, it has generated a completely new form of relationship interaction WHICH proves to be volatile and/or potent at many times.
having Facebook in you personal life has its ups and downs though, at one end it helps with a meaningful social interaction and helps in boosting self-esteem but on the other hand it also opens a Pandora’s box of options for spying, stalking and other insecurity- and jealousy-driven actions between lovers. ( True story 😛 )
and all those little scraps of data, the new relationships,the break up/ hate statuses and the digital PDA,can definitely affect you,your partner and the people around you, on how they view you as a person :P.
So how does Facebook affect your personal life: The way people present themselves on Facebook is mirrors the ways people think about themselves in reality.
- your use of social media (Facebook) either helps you with boosting your esteem or doesn’t. If it does help, it helps you through allowing you to add friends and people you would want to know,therefore it may increase your self esteem when you have a larger support group of friends who talk to you and help you out with things, but there is also the possibility that these interactions might be superficial
- The type of posts/status updates you make on Facebook can be of two types, they are either HONEST or SELF-EDITED. Honest status/posts show that you yourself are confident of who you are as a person therefore can interact with people in a better way. However if you use the self-edited path to posts and updates,it shows that you are presenting yourself in an improved light,hence showing a certain angle of insecurity you have within you.
- occasional exposure to Facebook has been seen as a good sign in enhancing a persons self-esteem,over exposure to Facebook has been seen as resulting in over-awareness about oneself and can cause stress and anxiety within.
Depending on how often you use Facebook, there are certain negative effects which you can experience due to it in your personal life:
- you are under stress of missing our on RSS feeds and information updates
- There is the stress from deleting unwanted contacts 😛
- you have to know how to BEHAVE (etiquette’s) on Facebook.
- you are under the impression (or mostly peer pressure) of keeping your posts and updates interesting and entertaining/humorous.
- There is stress build up from status comments.
- you worry about adding / accepting or not accepting unwanted contacts.
- Stress or friends/buddies finding out important pieces of news on your wall on Facebook first, instead of hearing it from you in person.
- there is tremendous stress when your “better” half or significant other does or does not want to post/update/confirm their relationship status. 😛
how Facebook affects your relationship (jealousy);
- Spending too much time on Facebook can turn you into one hell of a stalking-psycho boyfriend/girlfriend (just joking), BUT it has been seen that people who spend too much time on Facebook become acutely aware of what their significant half’s are posting an updating on their profiles, these people then tend to start over-analyzing each update and post, and try finding out underlying meanings to each of the posts, this can result in a level of insecurity between the relationship.
- its natural to archive every bit of new news or significant news on you FB profile,but that could mean like maintaining a public record of all the relationships you have so far been through with, this might be ok for you but NOT for your current partner.
- By changing your relationship status on Facebook you kinda make it “Official” to all the people on your network and the others who might join later, it could however look bad if you change your status but your partner does not respond to this with changing her relationship status and keeps it “single”,that would be kinda “ouch” for you :p, and in the case of the relationship breaking up it could lead to a public heartbreak.
- you need to watch what sorta comments and posts you receive on your profile,for sometimes a comment or post with too much information, or personalized , or even simple “cute” remarks can make your partner jealous.
- Breakups can be painful,and Facebook results in giving you this constant reminder of how great their lives have become (True story),its human nature an curiosity can get you checking on their Facebook updates,status pictures, post-breakup.
Nothing hits you quite as hard as public breakup issues if they are because of Facebook, you need not worry there are certain solutions:
- Talk to him/her,chat with them to find out if the problem is because of something on Facebook or is it something else.
- If there is something on your profile that you think might be making your partner jealous,try making a few adjustments to it to make them feel more comfortable.
- Facebook is bound to cause insecurities in your relation, so try and work out a daily basis plan of communication and growth in your relationship without the “Facebook” tool.
- If an ex’s post are way too much for you to handle, try blocking that contact and make it a point to never go on their profile again, delete yourself from the Facebook search for yourself and for them so that neither exists for the other.
- Edit your privacy setting, so that ex’s or past crushes or whoever cant see all your posts,status and cannot comment on them.
- Be careful/mindful of whatever is posted on Facebook and delete or take appropriate actions regarding it so that they dont come to haunt you later. 😛
Happy Facebooking peeps 🙂